In the darkness

Romans 5:8
…..but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

He loved us in our darkness.

Wow, those words have a way of striking at my heart.   

For so all I want is to have someone love me for all the good and bad
….not just for who I am in pictures or who I am on the first date!   

I want to know that if they find out about the rest of me that they will still want to be in my life. 

I think for so many years I was so afraid of people really finding out what a horrible sinner and friend that I was….
…that I hid…I hid behind good things.
I hid behind words and smiles and good deeds.  
I hid behind hard work and generosity.   
I hid behind anger and frustration.   
I hid behind friends.   

Slowly my sin started to creep up and I couldn’t hide it anymore.  

I let it out, I talked about it, I let others in.   

I started to be real and honest, not just before other people always but before God.  

I let him in, I let him transform my heart and mind and soul.  I know with every fiber of my being that I am His.

I know that there is no one, nothing, no circumstance that can take that away. 

I let Him into my darkness to bring me into the light.

Now, the battle is to NOT go back to the darkness when I am afraid or ashamed or guilty, but to continue in the light.

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